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Recommended Books: What We’re Reading (and how it helps us understand change)

books-about-menopause

When you’re learning about peri- and post-menopause some of your BFF’s are recommended books about menopause. The truth is not so long ago you would have been hard-pressed to find a good list of recommended books about menopause.

Lucky for us,  there are plenty to choose from these days. And they’re not stuffy, dry old tomes. In fact, many are written by women for women who’ve been there or are there.

3 Recommended Books About Menopause

We’ve added three local releases to our stable of highly recommended books about menopause.

Each book covers important facts, references pivotal research and shares relatable stories.

But most of all they’re an easy read.

Not one of them will send your head into a tailspin. Whether you’re in the throes of peri and finding your brain isn’t thinking clearly. Or, if you’re in post-menopause and your brain is back on an even keel.

And you’ll probably feel like you would love to dine with the authors!

1. Don’t Sweat It

How to make ‘the change’ a good one

by Nicky Pellegrino

The first couple of paragraphs in Don’t Sweat It read*:

“Everyone was really, really annoying. What was wrong with them all? The tension of it, day after day, was making me clench my jaw so tightly it ached. All because every single person I had any dealings with at all was driving me crazy.

Then it occurred to me: I was the common denominator here. Other people had always been irritating; it was me who had changed. I had lost my ability to deal with it. I was in a towering rage most of the time – not because of anything that was happening in the outside world. But due to the changes going on inside my own body.”

Nicky-Pellegrino-Don't-Sweat-It

The good stuff

“There is good stuff coming. When I asked women to share some of it, I heard about increased energy and post-menopausal zest. Many seemed to be exploring their creative side and taking back ownership of their time after years of giving it to others. These were the true freedom years, women told me.”

‘Freedom. Finally free of caring about what others think. Free of being sexualised. Free to redefine myself.’ 

and 

‘I love having no periods, and all that comes with it. I walk past the tampons/pads in the supermarket and just smile that it’s not part of my world’.”

What’s in the book?

Nicky-pellegrino-author
Nicky Pellegrino

A gifted storyteller, Nicky goes on to share the story of her own experiences, combined with friends, several high-profile women and the biology and science of menopause. Nor does she pull back on her personal issues.

Indeed, she includes nutritional wisdom in the chapter entitled ‘Food: friend or foe?’ Addresses ageing in ‘Inflammation, telomeres and the science of ageing well. Covers health in  ‘Hearts, minds and bones’. She gets more personal in the sleep chapter ‘And then the menopause stole my superpower’. Hones in on weight gain in ‘And then the menopause stole my wardrobe’. Oh, and sex in ‘And then the menopause (hopefully) borrowed my libido’.

Summary

“Life can be even better once the hormonal storm subsides. Women who no longer shop for tampons are out there. Running countries and businesses, acting in hit Hollywood movies, writing award-winning books, crashing through glass ceilings. It isn’t always easy, but then what is? By the time we hit midlife we’ve weathered a lot of other storms – so we’ve got this, we really do.

Midlife changes us in ways we never imagine. Sometimes it feels as if we’re rebuilding ourselves from the group up. This new version of us – what will we want, and who are we going to be? I guess it’s time to find out.”

While it’s written in Nicky’s entertaining and witty style, Don’t Sweat It doesn’t pull any punches. Which makes it an interesting mix of being an enjoyable read while not sugar coating the potential menopausal challenges some women experience.

Allen & Unwin Buy Now

Who’s Nicky?

Nicky Pellegrino is one of New Zealand’s most experienced health writers. She is also a highly successful novelist.

* shortened for space reasons.

2. Queen Menopause

Finding your majesty in the mayhem

by Alison Daddo

Alison writes*:

“Writing this book goes against every fear I have about speaking my truth, having a strong opinion, being seen, and putting myself and my thoughts, words, actions on a platform to be analysed, dissected and judged.

Who am I to have a voice? Who am I not to?

But the cliff is there and I’m taking a leap. I don’t think the cliff is that high, in all honesty. It’s just the machinations in my head.

Queen-Menopause-Alison-Daddo

Letter to you

Dear Reader,

I’m gathering you are here holding this book because you are about to experience or are on your path towards menopause.

This is what I want to say to you.

There will be changes, both big and small. You can and will handle it all. When you look in the mirror and don’t recognise your body anymore, when you feel angry all the time, or taken to the depths of despair, know that you are not alone, know that this is normal. You are normal.

Know that millions of women have felt the same way as you. You might need to fight hard against the mood swings, take stock of your health, change your attitude towards your life, who you are, or who you think you are.

Menopause might be the hardest battle of your life, but it might also be the best. It might even be the easiest transition ever. I believe in approaching menopause with a positive mindset, with a willingness to love yourself through the thick and the thin of every symptom, and getting all the help you need.

Choose – and by that, I mean really make choices that don’t seem like obvious ones – to find the positive in all that you are feeling. Find the healing. Step into the next phase of your life open to everything and anything. I believe that you, we, can all look back at this time in our lives and say, ‘Now that was a ride’.

You might have to drag yourself to the door of happiness and throw yourself in, but please, just do it. And see if you can drag your friends in with you. Collectively we are stronger, wiser and kinder. Be the light for other women who might need someone to show them that menopause is not the end. It’s just the beginning.

Love, me

books-about-menopause
Photo: cottonbro @pexels

What’s in the book?

Queen Menopause is interspersed with pertinent quotes and research. Also, there are words of wisdom like the Myths Of Menopause such as ‘there’s something wrong with you’ or ‘menopause begins at 50’.

In addition, Alison’s added interviews about menopause with some high-profile Australian women such as actress Georgie Parker and television presenter Sally Obermeder.

Summary

“I’ve never been so confronted by my beliefs about who I am and how I treat myself than when going through menopause. We all begin again every day; every time we wake up it’s another renewal. So goes menopause – it’s a renewal of the most significant time. A metamorphosis involving some mighty big changes. If we didn’t experience all the changes and pains and challenges, would the other side of it feel as sweet?

I think not. The most beautiful sunset is from the top of the mountain you climbed yourself. so keep climbing, make sure you take your crown. You earned it. You are queen menopause. Thank you for listening to my story. Please go tell yours; tell it with all the emotions and feelings it deserves.”

Related: Would you like to share your story as Alison suggests? Click here.

Allen & Unwin – Buy now

* shortened for space reasons.

Who’s Alison?

Many 50+ women in Australia and New Zealand grew up reading Dolly magazine. A former model, Alison Daddo (nee Brahe) featured on the cover several times as well as Cosmo, Myer magazine and more. She subsequently married heartthrob and television personality Cameron Daddo. Alison gladly gave up modelling when they moved to the US. And almost 30 years later the couple are parents to three children and have re-settled back in Australia.

3. Next Level

next-level-stacy-sims-selene-yeager

Your Guide to Kicking Ass, Feeling Great, and Crushing Goals Through Menopause and Beyond

by Dr Stacy T. Sims, PhD with Selene Yeager

Stacy Sims and her co-author Selene, have produced a comprehensive book for active, athletic women.

What’s in the book?

Part one explains menopause. The statistics, the science and hormones while part two focuses on performance. It covers cardio, weights, menopausal strength loss and gut health for athletic glory.

Stacy goes on to cover eating enough (important), fuelling for exercise, nutrition timing and hydration.

She rounds this off with sleep, recovery, mobility, core strength, mind matters, a strong skeleton and strategies for exercise through the menopause transition.

As you would expect from a scientist, the pages are peppered with science along with useful graphs, diagrams and images.

Selene Yeager writes*:

“When I was 43, menopause was the last thing on my mind. I had just come off a jam-packed race season and was gearing up for a big year that would include two international bid races, among other fitness goals. I had never felt better or stronger in my life.”

At 47 I was still stage racing and feeling good – but I had stopped sleeping like the dead the way I used to. Instead, I’d wake up at 3 am in a pool of sweat with panicky racing thoughts. I chalked it up to work-life stress.

Two years later

I looked in the mirror and could barely recognise the image staring back. I’d always been a super-muscular woman. Those muscles seemed to have diminished overnight. I’d gained fat in places where I’d never had it. My power was down. I felt sluggish and slow. My periods, which had always been like clockwork, were all over the map.

I’d hit it [perimenopause] head on. I was now having some hot flashes and mood swings as well. Hills that were no big deal in 20 years of cranking up them felt like someone had turned up the volume on gravity. Even my vagina hurt sometimes. Once confident and bold, I was feeling the ground shift beneath my feet, like running on an off-camber trail.

Worse, nothing I did seem to help. I doubled down on going to the gym. I ate less. I did more yoga, Nada. I’m a realist, I accept that you don’t just get fitter and faster till you die. But this seemed sudden and intractable.

Scouring the internet

I started scouring the internet for resources for active women going through their menopausal years. It was like swimming through a sea of negativity. Everything out there made it sound like the most awful time of life imaginable. The advice that did address menopause in a meaningful way wasn’t directed at us – active women wanting to stay on top of our game – but mainly at sedentary women. That’s because the majority of menopause research is done on sedentary women.

How I got my mojo back

So I emailed Stacy. I went on and on, stress-gushing about all the changes I’d been experiencing, seemingly out of the blue. As is her way, she was completely unfazed. She told me to dial back all the sets and reps I’d been doing in the gym and to start “lifting heavy sh*t.

I took all of her advice to heart. And it worked. In 2019, at 50 years of age, I won Iron Cross – an arduous mixed-terrain bike race.  More importantly, I got my mojo back.”

books-about-menopause
Photo by Anastasia Shuraeva @pexels

Stacy says, “This book is for everyone entering, currently in, or already through their menopausal years. We have many goals for this book, but the biggest one is to bring menopause out of the shadows. As Selene shares in the foreword, if you’re looking for information from mainstream media outlets about how to maximise your performance during menopause, you’d better pack a snack…and some binoculars. You won’t find many coaches, trainers or other experts in the fitness space giving straight-up advice on how to work with your physiology to maximise your fitness during menopause. Few even utter the word at all. But menopause doesn’t have to be the end of you kicking ass at the gym, on the trail, in the saddle, or wherever you work out.”

Summary

Even if you’re not an athlete or gym bunny, or if you’re a lapsed one thinking you’re ‘too old’, this book will motivate you. It will encourage you to get back to challenging your body while giving you the foundations of exactly how to do that at during peri/menopause. (As I wrote this paragraph I simply had to stand up and do some of the moves on page 232!)

Penguin Random House – Buy now

Who’s Stacy?

Stacy Sims, MSC, PhD, is a forward-thinking international exercise physiologist and nutrition scientist who aims to revolutionise exercise nutrition and performance, especially for women. An American, currently living in New Zealand, Dr Sims has directed research programs at Stanford, AUT University, and the University of Waikato.

* shortened for space reasons.

Conclusion

books-about-menopause
Photo by Yan Krukov @pexels

There is so much goodness on the pages of these recommended books on menopause. Certainly, each offers incredibly valuable information. And there is laughter, tears, sadness, joy and searing honesty.

As I have noted there is also pivotal research and science underpinning them all. Furthermore, Dr Stacy Sims (and Selene Yeager’s) Next Level is particularly useful for the athletes amongst you. Indeed, her depth of knowledge and passion for sharing information shines out from the pages.

All in all, there are very good reasons these have made our list of recommended books on menopause. Every single one is well worth a read.

Don’t miss more advice from Dr Sims and Alison Daddo’s story over the next couple of weeks.

You might also like:

3 Recommended Movies About Menopause

Nine Women Over 60 Who Inspire Us

13 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Started Perimenopause

 

Main image: Yaroslav Shuraev @pexels

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Post-menopause


This is the time when menstruation is well and truly over, the ovaries have stopped producing high levels of sex hormones and for many ladies, perimenopause symptoms subside.

Estrogen has protective qualities and the diminished levels mean organs such as your brain, heart and bones become more vulnerable. It’s also a key lubricant so your lips may become drier, your joints less supple and your vagina might be drier. In addition, your thyroid, digestion, insulin, cortisol and weight may alter.

At this juncture, a woman might experience an increase in the signs of reduced estrogen but she should have a decrease of perimenopause symptoms. That said, some women will experience symptoms like hot flushes for years or even the rest of their lives.

Perimenopause

Peri = ‘near’

Most females begin to experience the symptoms of perimenopause in their mid-forties. Your progesterone levels decline from your mid-30s but it’s generally from around 40 that the rest of your sex hormones begin to follow suit. 

Perimenopause is a different experience for every woman and some women may barely notice it. The first indicators are usually changes to the monthly cycle. This means that for some ladies, this can be accompanied by things like sore breasts, mood swings, weight gain around the belly, and fatigue as time goes on.

For those with symptoms it can be a challenging time physically, mentally and emotionally.

Importantly, perimenopause lasts – on average – four to 10 years. The transition is usually a gradual process and many women enter perimenopause without realising.